Hand me a bucket.
I am so conflicted right at the moment. The idea of tossing a bucket on my head and running repeatedly into a brick wall sounds quite delightful.
Yesterday was my last day at work (which I referred to as my “social experiment”). Being in an office setting and temporarily focusing my time and energies on simple tasks while indulging in the requisite small talk with actual people was a very welcome relief from my own internal dialogue. Now, I am back to work at home, where my energies will definitely be put to better use - but I don’t know that I can put up with myself for too long a stretch.
Added to the dilemma, is the fact that I have found my emotional state in a somewhat regressive pattern. I am turning into the teenager that I never was. How idiotic. Here I thought that I was safe.
By virtue of choice, I keep people at a healthy arm’s length. I am a fairly solitary being (as both a friend and the duo Simon and Garfunkle have said, I am an island). Today, I can report that I already miss people. I can also report that I have a little bit of a crush on someone. What the hell is happening? An island does not develop crushes.
What to do?
Well, for starters, I stained the trim in my bathroom the other night. This morning I stripped and stained the bathroom vanity. Then, I rode my pony. I may get ambitious and work with one or two of the other horses before the day is through, but that is somewhat doubtful.
My crushee told me that he believes I have bitten off far more than I can chew in terms of the ridiculous amount of work that needs to be done in the house and on the farm in general. I have been told this multiple times before, but was always able to shrug it off. Now, I am really questioning my judgement. Thanks a lot fellow. Sadly, I trust his judgement and know that in many ways he is absolutely right. Being a closet optimist, I will try to prove both of us wrong.
So, my neighbor farmer man stopped by just now. He regaled me with a story of his tractor that caught fire yesterday and we discussed which pastures he would renting from us to grow crops this season. I don’t mind renting out the land for crops, but have firmly declared that I no longer will have corn planted here - I am not a fan of the mess it makes, the incredible amount of chemicals that go into the growing process, nor the government subsidy programs - the documentary King Corn which aired on PBS recently has only fueled my long standing disdain. So, soybeans and hay will abound. The worst part of planting season (aside from the rumble of diesel-fueled tractors at all hours) is the fertilization of the fields. Nothing smells worse than thousands of gallons of liquid cow manure wafting on the breeze.
Can life get better than this?
Anonymous said:
These are so fun. I alway’s want to sing “horses horses horses horses” wherever that is from. Don’t quit.
May 10th, 2008 at 10:49 pm #
Dino Corvino said:
I tend to go to movies, over and over again.
King Corn was pretty amazing. Even for us vegetarians.
You have told me about the house, and I think it is an overwhelming task. But, get a dewaldt cordless driver, and anything is possible.
And ADvil PM
May 11th, 2008 at 1:16 am #
Brad Weiland said:
Fear not my dear, Spring has finally arrived(Somewhat). All you need is a little patience and a heaping helping of determination. This “fellow” sounds like he knows not what he says. Keep your chin up and your nose to the grindstone and things will come around. Oh and tell your “crushee” he should get off of his bum and help instead of criticizing! Of course thats just my opinion I could be wrong. BE WELL!!!
May 12th, 2008 at 9:43 am #
Billie said:
Dino, you are an endless source of inspiration and support. How about rustling up some hands to get the barn built? My latest brainstorm (other than Sunspot for my birthday - we need to chat about that by the way) was to have a kickball party/bonfire/bash once the barn is up. Any volunteers?
King Corn was really incredible. I love that the fellows purchased their acre of land and kept it in grass to play ball on. It gives one hope.
May 12th, 2008 at 7:29 pm #
Billie said:
Brad, I am guessing that you are a guy… (now, I should know better than to assume anything based on names, but I am quite imperfect - if you have read this blog, that should go without saying).
That said, and as a presumed guy, I will pass on your words to “crushee” and see what happend. Will keep you all posted. I think he will beg off, but I could be wrong. (Nice touch of Dennis Miller there, dear reader).
Anonymous - thanks! I don’t know the song… you should sing it for us all!
May 12th, 2008 at 7:33 pm #