This happens to me every year during the week before Christmas. Most of the other 51 weeks of the year, I’m a model of efficiency and organization. I know exactly where each member of our family needs to be and when. I know which items are the most important on my to-do list, and how I will get them done. I can quickly determine the whereabouts of my son’s missing Lightning McQueen, or pinpoint the exact location of my daughter’s other dance shoe.
But during this week each year, I turn into a crazy freak. I am overwhelmed by the constant buying, returning, gift-wrapping, baking, cleaning, errand-running, party-planning, menu-making, sending of cards, and decorating that needs to be fit into my already busy schedule. The weird thing is that I have scaled my Christmas activities down to only those things that I truly enjoy, but it’s still all just too much. It all makes me very cranky. I swear that if Shawn mentions one more time how much he loves Christmas, I will punch him in the face. Now, I’m quite certain that Christmas is not intended to inspire such feelings. It’s enough to make the Baby Jesus cry. Clearly, I am missing something.
1. So, my first question is: How do you tame the Christmas Crazies? Or are you as insane as me?
2. Do you send Christmas cards? This is a task I could eliminate, but I truly enjoy receiving them. And alas, to continue to receive them, I must give them.
3. Do you like reading Holiday Letters that sometimes accompany Christmas cards? Or do you find them annoying? I love them. Even the ones full of bragging or mundane details. Shawn and I both have large families, and those letters are sometimes the only news we get. Shawn writes our letter each year, and he does a fabulous job. It’s an Onion-inspired newspaper theme that makes fun of this wacky family of ours, especially the kids. We’ve had several distant relatives tell us they anxiously wait for it each December. My aunt told me she brings it to work every year so her coworkers can have a laugh at our expense. But I’m sure there are just as many others who find it obnoxious. Oh well…can’t please everyone!
4. Do you make resolutions? I gave up on that a while back, but I do evaluate my life and come up with a few goals I’d like to work on throughout the year. I eliminate things that aren’t working for me, and try to start new habits that will enrich my life in some manner. For 2009, I am thinking about running a half-marathon and volunteering at The Neighbor’s Place.
5. Do you volunteer? I’m very careful about volunteering, but I do it when it feels right. My time is precious, and I only want to spend it on things that speak to my heart. For example, I volunteer in my daughter’s classroom, but I wouldn’t want volunteer to assemble a mailing at the school. The mailing may be important, but I want to get the maximum personal benefit for the limited time I’m able to give. That sounds selfish. Is it OK to volunteer for selfish reasons?
kvolunteers
10:05 pm on December 19th
Thanks, Melissa for making me feel so normal!!
I’ll take Q 5. YES it’s okay to volunteer for selfish reasons – feeling passionate about your volunteer gig will keep you coming back! I started VolunteerSpot.com because I was frustrated with the little hassles that made volunteers opt out of helping at school and Scouts – things like reply-all email, Yahoo!Groups, clipboard sign up sheets, and activities that were over staffed. Take the mailing example – it’s the perfect job for a working parent who wants to help (and show their kids they are helping) but can never make it to school for ‘face time’.
VolunteerSpot is free and makes it easy for teachers and volunteer leaders to ASK for help – setting an online calendar of specific needs. Parents are invited by email to sign-up, and VolunteerSpot handles automated confirmation and reminder messages. Simpler communication means less burnout and more turnout!
Here’s our blog article with ideas for saving your time, money and sanity over the holidays with VolunteerSpot (also speaking to Q1): http://blog.volunteerspot.com/volunteer_guru/2008/11/5-ways-volunteerspot-can-save-you-time-money-save-your-sanity-help-you-give-back-this-hoiliday-seaso.html
HAPPY HOLIDAYS – You’re going to make it!!!
oldwoodchair
1:57 am on December 22nd
It seems everyone is pretty busy this week…not a lot of time to even answer these questions. But I am bound & determinted to enter the slow lane this holiday season, so here goes.
1. I have been historically crazy this time of year…shopping, baking, wrapping, writing, decorating, making lists on top of lists, and getting by on very little sleep. But this year is different for me. My mom passed away last weekend and that set priorities for me this season. I spent a week planning a funeral instead of shopping. And so, I’ve discovered, like the Who’s in Whoville, that Christmas will come without the ribbons & bows…it will come just the same. I’m relaxed, for the first time ever during this season. Christmas will come & we will celebrate and eat and revel in the joy of being together, and so what if my tree has a few less ornaments or my Christmas cards didn’t go out this year…Christmas will come & it will be joyful. And I plan to make a habit of concentrating on the important.
2. I enjoy sending Christmas cards. I usually write a note in each card and send X’s & O’s in some. Next year, I’ll start writing them in September.
3. We get one holiday letter every year. I’m ashamed to say that it takes effort for me to read it. I’ve thought of writing one myself & just putting a bunch of crazy lies in it, just to see if anyone is paying attention. That would be fun…I’ll have to work on that.
4. No New Year’s resolutions for me. I have too much stuff to improve to wait for only one time a year…I make resolutions every other day.
5. When my kids were in school & I was a stay-at-home mom, I was like the “school mom”…there every day. But since they’re grown, I haven’t volunteered my time to any good cause…I just give money and/or goods to various organizations. I should be ashamed for not making that more of a priority, but time is at a premium.
Thanks for my question fix, Melissa! Hope everyone has great big Happy Holidays!
owc
Cheryl Mathis
8:00 am on December 22nd
1. My Christmas activities come in spurts. I’ll bake cookies all day for one day. I’ll decorate the house in one day. I’ll wrap presents non-stop for a few hours. In between times, I just relax and enjoy the season. We had very little money for gifts this year, so shopping wasn’t that difficult. I knew exactly what I was going to buy. Moderation, my dear.
2. My mom would send out over 200 Christmas cards every year. I remember how much fun it was to help address them and ask questions about every name on the list. As soon as I was married and starting a family of my own, I started sending out my own cards. I even stole a couple dozen of her names because they’ve felt like friends all these years, even though we only communicate through Christmas cards. I design my own card and write a nice letter to go along with it, and I handwrite something personal for each recipient. And I LOVE getting cards from people as well. I’ve never met some of the people I get cards from because they are my husband’s extended family, so this is the only contact I have with them. It’s a lovely tradition, and I’ll be sad when it fades out, which it probably will eventually.
4. Resolutions. I hate them, and I don’t do them. I make resolutions every day of the year to eat less, be nicer, etc. There’s nothing about the new year that’s going to make those resolutions mean any more. I have never met anyone who made a resolution to lose weight or quit smoking and actually have them follow through in the long term. The reasons for losing or quitting have to be much deeper than a calendar tradition.
5. I think it’s fine to volunteer for selfish reasons. As long as a need is being met, it’s fine. And I’m one of those people who would rather help with a mailing than in a classroom. I love folding paper and addressing envelopes. See? Everyone according to their purpose. We all have special talents and skills, and chances are, nearly every need will be met.
Alex
8:57 am on December 22nd
1. No craziness here, it is what it is. I have a Blackberry Curve that tells me where to go and what to do.
2. We do not send cards, we make calls or send happy bright emails.
3. I like holiday letters. My mom always has done one, and my sister does one with a funny in family sports section.
4. The smoking will end in about ten days.
5. I don’t volunteer, but I do help in the neighborhood with snow blowing. I have this huge MAC snowblower, and I help those with shovels after all big snows. That is what I can do today.
Lisa Shilts
7:22 am on December 23rd
1. I do pretty well, but on Sunday I was getting overwhelmed – after going to 3 different grocery stores to get all my food for the next two weeks! I am able to keep organized and get most things done, otherwise the holidays are not enjoyable. ALso, the dynamics really change as your children get older; now that mine are grown there isn’t as much craziness. But they still insist we make Grandma’s Christmas cookies!
2. I do send cards, and a lengthy letter, and usually a photo or two. BUT, I only send them to my out-of-town friends and families. I do not understand receiving cards from people I talk to every day or who live here in town and I see often; they are for updating old friends. And PLEASE do not send me a card with no personal note or photo! I don’t want just a card with no personal touch.
3.I write a lengthy holiday letter, which friends claim to really enjoy! It started when I moved to Wisconsin 21 years ago, and mostly highlighted the cultural differences I came across. It has disintegrated into me telling embarassing stories about myself!
4. Here’s a challenge: Always make one resolution you know you will keep! Every year I vow to NOT wear a bathing suit all year! The only year I broke it was when we went to Hawaii and I figured no one that I know would see me!
5. You will find different ways to volunteer through the years. Getting a Little Brother or Sister is great when you have kids, or volunteering at their schools.
For years I was immersed in youth hockey, everything from fundraising to team manager to uniforms. Then I organized the graduation party at DCE. Now I mentor a 16 year old girl, and teach Bible Class. Everyone does something, and the background work (mailings and such) is just as important. The key is to pick something you like, and that involves your family – you don’t want your volunteering to take away from your valuable family time.
Happy Holidays to All!
Timothy Pickett
1:44 pm on December 23rd
Seriously, not to sound like The Grinch or Scrooge but I do absolutely nothing for the Christmas Holidays. I do not buy gifts, bake cookies, trim a tree, decorate, have any warm fuzzy feelings or share a memory about Christmases past. Christmas to me is all about family and close friends…. I have neither, which is fine with me in the long run or at the least… for now. I’d rather work.
1. I’m crazy enough eveyday. Christmas doesn’t compound this… it actually makes me laugh a bit to watch and hear others go through it.
2. Nope.
3. Don’t read them because I don’t get them.
4. I make resolutions all the time, New Years is just another day for me.
5. Yes, I volunteer but not in a normal sense.
I volunteer to work when others cannot, just do not want to or are not able to.
I volunteer to give money to charities if they are credible and that no portion of it goes to pay a salary. I volunteer to give money to the homeless (or people that need it) when I see them on the street… I just walk up to them and hand them money that they need not ask for.
Sincerely, have a nice Holiday Season. I’ll kick back, watch a little football, write an article (or work on my screenplay) and relax with my regular holiday culinary fare…. two frozen turkey pot pies and a glass of milk.
wordsmith
6:18 pm on December 26th
1. I don’t get too crazy at Christmas time because I’m usually ahead of the game when it comes to shopping. And if I’m ever caught in the mess of shoppers during late Christmas shopping, I see it as an enlightening experience and let it be.
2. I rarely sent Christmas cards in the past, but I decided this year to send out Christmas cards to several friends, each with a personal, sincere message in each card. I ended up sending out about 50 when this was done, and each card had about a page worth of sincerity wrapped into it. I probably got about 6 cards back, but it didn’t matter. My goal was to let everyone dear to me know how much I appreciate them and have them think twice before discarding the card in January. I think I’ll keep this up. There’s something very wholesome about it.
3. I don’t care for the Christmas letter. I understand why some resort to it, but it always feels so distant. Basically, someone write a letter recapping a year’s worth of events and then finds a bunch of their friends’ addresses and mails it out. It’s a great thought, and it’s nice to have, but it doesn’t have a personal touch to it at all. I’d much rather someone send me a paragraph in a card with a sincere message than a three-page document about someone’s year. But that’s just me.
4. I try to make one realistic resolution each year. In 2006, it was to get myself in better shape and improve my diet. I did just that. Last year, I decide to cut out frivolous spending. I did that as well. This year, I’m not sure yet, but I’ll figure something out.
5. I do volunteer, but it’s not as frequent as I’d like it to be.
emorris
3:04 pm on December 29th
Marijuana plays a large role in “taming my Christmas Crazies.”