I don’t know cars
I don’t ooze orgasmic juices over cylanders and drive shafts
the power of horses matters little to me.
but this damn car
this god damn automobile that is always vacating it’s functionality and granting it’s owner with the neverceasing, (never working) always breaking laundry list of problems.
problems.
I’m not a mechanic, I can barely change a fuse.
fuckmycar.
Trembling yesterdays.
The memories so reptilian.
Foreign and distant, taken away like yesterday’s scraps.
Nails of dead cells scrape interconnected patterns onto chalkboards and coloring books.
a child’s plaything to reckon with.
Pendulous, I reach but the well of youth runs venomous today, tomorrow, yesterday, forever.
you see…
If I had a bag of miracles I’d reach inside and pluck one out, probably stare at it a while before making it bear fruit.
A veritable vineyard of blossoming wishes would open before me and beckon me back to the glorious days of Pizza eating Kung-fu Turtles, inline skates, and technacolor t-shirts.
but my destination isn’t the past.
it’s the now.
and though I find my self envious of what my own children have, that precious innocence that I can no longer bathe in, that I cannot reclaim. I am happy.
still.
oh captain/my captain
oh bastard/my saint
oh savior/oh sinner
oh mother/oh Hate
oh jesus/oh Devil
oh laying protrate
vessel of expression
the music innate
(new songs by me)
www.myspace.com/ohcaptainwausau
it’s so white
reflective, my retinas melt.
brighter than summer’s hot.
as frigid as politics.
sometimesithinkiliveinhell.
they lost
I didn’t really care. Slow nights make for parades of gossip and quick glances.
Is he? Is She? Are we? Did you see?
The game a catalyst to avoid that conversation and delve into the deeper, the meta.
and the Alpha Omega Beginning End tongue lashing never ceases but leaves me somewhere in between.
middle ground.
We speak of the past years days as if they were eons ago (they sometimes feel so)
It was rotational, words rotational and redundant.
I find myself repeating ; can I stop repeating?
this satellite year.
the dogs perspiration has been freezing when she goes outside to piss. it’s cold in wausau, too damn cold.