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My Journey Back to Health

Hoping that all the years of fun might be reversible

A return to my Yoga Practice

by Dino Corvino on May 12th, 2008 • No Comments »

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First off, I want to say that Cat Power rules. Holy cow. Thank you Jason. I had missed this.

Tonight was a special night. I restarted my yoga practice. It so happens that a friend, Annie, is becoming a certified teacher. So I am more than willing to spend a few hours a week working with her. The thing is, I love yoga. Nothing in my life feels or has felt as good. I did yoga in college, and post college, only in the depression of the past few years has it faded away. The time in the woods, the Pub years, drove yoga our of me. It is amazing to have this wonderful gift and have it be part of my journey.

It was really important that I start this. I think that after a while, I forget about the need. The importance of the ground, and the roots. I know that many people do not care, but for me, it is important. To not lose the way of the root. For me, the simple thing, the breath is the most important thing. I have moved beyond the need to open this chakra or that, but I do believe in it, but for me, I have moved past it.

I think that in a lot of ways, this is about immediacy. The connection to right now. Here. In this moment. I need to be fully here. Not other places. I like that the best.

The photo above, it is the trailhead that me and Sullie are going to be walking.

Oh no.

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Saturday Night was Made for Lovers

by Dino Corvino on May 11th, 2008 • No Comments »

Me and Hershey

So today I went and saw the trail me and Sullie are going to be taking on. It looks hard. I walked up to the trailhead, and I was shot already. I mean it, I was shocked at how hard it is actually, to walk up hill. I sort of think this might be more than either of us are ready for, but I tend to think that there is no better opportunity to move forward.

This week was a strange week emotionally. One of the days, a few people told me that I was maturing because I chose to not get into a fight that a year ago was taylor made for me. Then Sullie told me that I sound totally differant since I have been at my job. I do not know about why the person was goading me, but there was nothing noble in my response, in fact I was asleep. So I just simply missed it.

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Emotional Week

by Dino Corvino on May 9th, 2008 • No Comments »

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So, save for some time on the phone with Amanda, every serious relationship I have ever had, with any woman who I was with, I had them all this week. ALL OF THEM. Spring fever? Moving? Who knows.

Anyway, the past few weeks have been brutal as I said at work. But yesterday I finally slowed down. Monday figures to be pretty intense, but then I should have a full 7 days of just MY job. Not the job of a full of research team, and my job. I mean I know that htis is in fact a once in a lifetime thing, but it is tiring.

So, like I said, I gained 2 pounds, but I lost the two pounds this week. Me and El Hershbo got a great walking route, and it sure is nice. Quiet, alone, off lease, not asphalt. LONG. So that is something.

Tomorrow I am going to go look for this thing Sullie was telling me about, a logging trail we are looking to do. I think both he and I are sort of at this point where we need some exercise inspriration, and maybe we can find it with each other.

Exercise, gym, insomnia

Plus 2

by Dino Corvino on May 7th, 2008 • No Comments »

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Well tonight I weighed myself. I gained 2 pounds. I have to say that I am so disappointed. It is something I sort of expected, given the amount of hours at work, I ended up reaching for Mt Dew three or four times, and Culvers is right there. So that is never good. Chicken fingers man. they add up.

What is nice though, I feel good. Tonight El Hershbo and I redid I our giant walk. I go down Chadwick, up the police station, then down the Mountain Bay trail, to Arrow bar, then I turn left, and work my way back home. It was and is a good walk.

I feel commited to the program that Kelly and the staff at Aspirus Weight Mangement gave me.

My only concern is prescriptions. As I am out of the program, Dr Reed does not write my lexapro script. I have not had a regular doctor since college. So I need one.

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Depression is real, and Medical

by Dino Corvino on May 2nd, 2008 • 4 Comments »

So I am going to say, holy shit. I have been off of the lexapro for about a week now, and honestly I am a wreck. I have never really experienced this, and man oh man.

So, I finished with the weekly time at Winning Weighs. I think. The program was so amazing, and changed my life in such a way that I will never return to bad habits. It was a simple change, but one so amazing.

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But with that, some of my prescriptions ran out. Not the metformin, but the lexapro did. My doctor in the program is the one who prescribed it, and the pharmacy said this or that, and now I am done with it. So, I suppose I need to go get a doctor. I truly do not want to, but I am 37 now.

But this week was just brutal emotionally. I had a work project pause for a few days, after working at a blistering pace and intensity, so suddenly I had a ton of sort of exhale time. I just got brutally sad, and argumentative, and I have been a dick.

I mean I am legitimately sad. There really is no way around that, I might be a depressed dude. I can not tell. But the swing this week was brutal.

So, I am sorry Jim and Tom and Andy. I think you guys took the brunt of it. I am so sorry. I am emotionally tired, but lashing out like I did at you, my friends was not cool. You mean a lot to me, so I am sorry.

I think for a while, the key to this thing will be endorphin management. I broke a milestone in weight loss, and suddenly a number thing is within reach. It is right there, a few thousand miles on the treadmill away. I so want to see that number. If I see that number, I am totally going to vegas.

Prince at Coachella. Better than sex with a supermodel. And I should know.

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A rainy day in boston

by Dino Corvino on April 30th, 2008 • No Comments »

A Rainy Day In Boston.

Do not disturb.

I sit here at this desk by the window on the ninth floor, watching the rain fall onto the city. The clouds move across the skyline like waves, the traffic roars through the rain soaked streets.

Thoughts come and go.

Let them go.

Go.

Get the legs moving, the heart beating, the lungs inspired.

Nine miles along the Charles River, music blasting in my head. No one is out here but the wind, the rain and me.

I see baby geese chasing their mother along the banks and I feel homesick.

I let it go.

I am right here, right now.

There are no days off, no downtime, no spare time, no time to kill.

I don’t relax. I don’t wind down. I don’t take it easy. I just live. I just go.

The time is always now.

This is meditation. Nine miles in the wind and rain, observing.

Thoughts come and go.

Go.

Back in the room.

Do not disturb.

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Adidas Response TR 14

by Dino Corvino on April 27th, 2008 • One Comment »

I feel motivated.  I feel committed to this more now than ever.

A while ago my friend Jim Carlson and I were talking about new shoes.  I had burned through my New Balance shoes, and needed something new.  I felt more committed and more serious, and Carlson suggested the Adidas Trail shoe.  So, I went ahead and bought it at Footlocker here in town.

The shoe is amazing.  It is soft, and firm at the same time.  It feels safe under my feet, and it is stable.  The shoe is lighter than I thought a shoe could be.  I use it on the treadmill, and a little bit on the outside world.

In college, I was a Nike guy, but Jackie bought those for me.  I ran a bit in college, but not since.  This feels awesome.  It is funny, because the simple things make this fun.

The right headphones.  The shoes.  Good socks.

All of it makes me more likely to be a happy dude on a treadmill.

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Why I am not leaving the YMCA

by Dino Corvino on April 23rd, 2008 • No Comments »

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So, I am down another 3 pounds. I am finally feeling like I am getting down to something. I have another 29 pounds and then I will really start to look at some new clothes.

Anyway, tonight I finally went back ot the gym. Took a week off or so, cuz of work. Work is going from roughly 4 am, to 9 pm. We have a giant deadline, and it just keeps killing us all.

So at the Y, I went and sat in the steam room, and it just sweated the day away. The crap that existed, was totally gone

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Another 4

by Dino Corvino on April 20th, 2008 • 2 Comments »

So I lost another 4 pounds.  I feel better now than ever before to tell you the truth.  Working out is finally picking up steam.
And I am buying new car.  So that is cool to.

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I got No juice

by Dino Corvino on April 15th, 2008 • No Comments »

So, where is this all at?  This is all at a point where Dino is tired.  I mean really emotionally, and existentially tired.  I think I have been pushing out for so long, that I am at the end of it.  I am questioning everything in my life, and really wondering if I am making a mistake.

What is nice, though, is that I am eating well, and exercising according to my plan.

Though, I feel like crap.  And a little bit desperate.

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