Eating and Depression
I have to admit, I am fairly depressed. I feel disconnected from the people that care for me, and that I care for. I feel lonely. As such, I find myself from time to time, eating inappropriately. Take tonight for example. With the depression comes a pretty intense case of night time insomnia. I can’t sleep all night long. Nothing really to do.
About 4 am, I somehow found myself making a beef sandwich. I was not hungry, and honestly do not eat beef. But I think I had nothing to do, and the act of eating made me feel better.
It does not happen that often, since I have been on the program, but I think with the depression deepening, it is bound to happen a bit more.
I think the depression, with me, is a simple enough thing. This week I got VERY little sleep. I worked alone all week. Have not really seen or talked to my friends, and as such I feel pretty lonely. It is easy for the self loathing to kick up, when I do not for example, talk to Andy, I just assume that Andy is mad at me. The fact is, there is no evidence of that. But that inner monologue creates it.
I know I am tired, and lonely, and as such I need to be more vigilant about my exercise and diet.